Things that make me smile

I'm starting to think that 2 years is the height of drama - the highs are so high and lows are low. Kate is a very emotional person. Seemingly small things can really upset her. And when she is excited, wow! Lately she's been making me laugh with her funny sayings and take on the world. She really picks up subtly in conversation. A few conversations we've had recently:

Me: Kate, look it's snowing.
Kate: Is that the white stuff.
Me: Yes!
Kate: Well, can we celebrate mommy?

Kate: Mommy, you're not wearing a shirt.
Me: Yes I am, Kate. I'm wearing a black t-shirt.
Kate: Oh, you are wearing a shirt. Just not a very pretty one.

Me: Kate, if you have faith in God as small as a mustard seed, nothing will be impossible for you.
Kate: But mommy, I don't like mustard.

Brett (first thing in the morning): Kate, do you have a dry pull-up?
Kate: Maybe, maybe not. You never know. We'll have to check and see. (these are many of her favorite phrases.)

Elli is as sweet as she could be. What a darling little girl! She is SO joyful! When she smiles, her whole face lights up! It is so sweet. She is so talkative too. What fun!

Fighting off Mush

I recently adopted a new parenting strategy - when Kate asks me "why" she can or can't do something, I've started giving her the actual reason versus just saying "because." I'm happy to report that it seems to be working, as she's submitting more easily. A specific example is, when she asks to watch TV and I tell her no, I've explained it's because "if you watch too much TV your brain will turn to mush." Now she nods and moves on to something else. Here is a funny example from today of what this strategy is producing:

Kate: "Mommy, can I have another cookie."
Me: "No"
Kate: "But Mommy, I really want another cookie."
Me: "I understand you want another cookie. I would like another one too. But we can only have one cookie."
Kate: "Because our brain's will turn to mush."
Me: "No, if you eat to many cookies, your belly turns to mush, not your brain."
Kate: "And we don't want a mush brain or a mush belly."
Me: "That's exactly right, Kate."

Our home

Finally, our home looks like it belongs to us! The outside has not matched who we are, and the new red definitely does. Yay!

One of the best things that has happened to me in making improvements to our house - I'm starting to get confidence in my design aesthetic. I've struggled to embrace it at times, and I've learned that's at least partly because, I like things other people don't. I appreciate BOLD, UNIQUE, and DRAMATIC. I like things that are different, in general and in design. So, when I get other people's opinions, it often is not the same as mine, which hurts my confidence. The worst is when I don't go all in - then it's sort of a half-baked version of what I enjoy - lukewarm, blah. Kind of like the old exterior -

I'm so happy with the new colors. I think we've done the best we could with what we had to work with. Our neighbors definitely enjoy it - it fits in our unique and eclectic neighborhood well. Most of all, it reflects our family so much more. It feels like our home.

Gator!

This is probably my favorite wedding pic so far! Bride, Groom, flower girl, maid of honor, friends galor doing the GATOR at the wedding. Awesome! I love that Nikki is down in her dress, I love that Kate caught right on, I love that it's from Animal House, I just think it's awesome! A great event - fun had by all!

Faith

I'll start by saying - I LOVE THIS STORY! It is a testimony of God's goodness in my life. It's a goody: I had always questioned if I would physically be able to have children. There was plenty of evidence that suggested it would be difficult if not impossible. However, about 5 years ago, I stopped putting confidence in the difficulties happening in my body. Instead, I started listening to my heart and my spirit, and I knew I was going to be a mother. God started confirming this promise to me - I was going to bear children.

So, I started acting on that promise. Brett and I selected names for our unconceived children, we painted the bedrooms where they would sleep, and we started buying our unborn children clothes. About 5 years ago, I was shopping at Target and saw these adorable shoes, and I bought them for my future daughter. I had no sense of sizing, so I picked up the size that looked cute. Well, about 2 months ago, I stumbled across them, and what do you know, but Kate wears a size 8! A perfect match with Kate's red flower girl dress!

3 pairs of red shoes, 3 red dresses, 3 cute girls :)

Also noteworthy - a year ago, I interviewed my Grandma and learned a little more about her life story. One of the clear themes was, although she had endured challenges in her life, her FAITH never wavered. She never questioned the Lord's goodness toward her. We know that blessings endure through generations, and I know we will see the gift of faith in all our children.

Look at sweet little Ellie Belle :0)

I just bought her these shoes - they are a size zero! Who knew they made shoes in a size zero. Adorable

Andrew & Nikki French!

Congratulations Nikki & Andrew! Their wedding was awesome. I don't think I've ever been to a prettier reception - it was held at the Akron Art Museum and the setting was amazing. It was a fantastic, super fun party. Amazing.

Kate Little absolutely had the time of her life. She danced NON-STOP! She did a combination of running around the dance floor and shaking it.



More pics to come, but a few good ones from my camera:

G.Nana and Ellie - both having an amazing time :)


Brady & Brett

Krissy, Nikki & Cousin Mike

Mom, Nikki, Krissy & Dad

2 cute married couples

Receiving Grace

Overall, things are still going very well around here. Although, about a week ago, I ran out of grace for myself. What I mean by that is, when Ellie was first born, I considered myself successful if everyone was alive. Now all the sudden I've raised the bar much higher, and I can have a tendency to feel like a failure at everything. Another big issue is, I've started working on small projects, which I really enjoy, but finding someone to watch the girls on short notice has been a huge challenge. I may only have an hour call to do, but it becomes a big issue. I'm still working through that. But, we're doing our best. I think it will continue to get easier, and I've got to give myself more grace when it feels like Kate's watched too much tv, I didn't cook a great dinner because I was holding Ellie who couldn't fall asleep, Brett and I haven't gone out and had fun in too long, I didn't have time to work out, I didn't have time to read, pray, etc. Physically, mentally, spiritually & relationally I may be falling short of my bar, but my bar is too high. I need to receive more grace.



Look at this sweet picture of Elizabeth GRACE - a beauty :)

The blessing of family

We are so lucky to have such a wonderful family. Here are a few shots during Ellie's first month with people who love her so!

The School Girl

Kate started pre-school back in September, and she LOVES it!!! It is so good for her. The second day she came home and said, "Mom, it's time for Circle Time. Please sit down." Circle Time is a very structured time each day where they learn new things, sing songs, pick jobs, etc. She loves being in school. By the second week, her teacher told me she had made a friend, Avery. They like to do everything together - how sweet :)



I think I posted a while ago that I had planned for Kate to go to 2 different schools. One of the things I do as a consultant is "scenario planning." I think the second school was to ensure that if Ellie & I were having a tough time adjusting, particularly with sleep & energy, that Kate would still have fun and stimulating things to do. The great news is, with Ellie being such a wonderful and easy baby, Kate is only going to 1 school, Hyde Park Redeemer for 2 days a week, and then the rest of the time we're all doing stuff together. It's been really nice and a great blessing.



Today was the Halloween party - Avery, Kate's buddy, is the Fairy Princess in pink. Kate is a princess - way to go Tom Maybin on the idea of recycling the flower girl dress, adding a tiara and tada - a princess! Also pictured are the teacher, Mrs. Ahrens, twin brothers Joel & Joshua, and Mckenna the chicken. I loved today that Kate had something really fun to do, and I didn't have to plan or organize it.



Ellie had fun today too - here she is playing with her zebra toy from the Seddons. I think she's giving it a kiss :) What a cutie! Kate said today, "I love Ellie's pretty smiles :)"

Smile!

Look at this beautiful little baby!

(I will catch up my blog at some point, but I couldn't wait with this cute pic!)

6 weeks!

The past 6 weeks have gone by so fast, I can't believe it! We have been so busy it's been kind of ridiculous. I think we've been out of town in some capacity as a family for the past 4 weekends. Sort of a lot with a newborn, eh :) And still, we are doing great.

I'm a little hesitant to post about this for fear it will come out wrong, but it feels so important I'm going to try. We have experienced a complete gift and blessing with Ellie - she is an absolutely incredible sleeper. Now, I know baby sleep is such a loaded topic. I know this from experience from difficulties we've had with Kate over the years. But still I want to share this. Why? Not because we have some "secret" - it's actually quite the contrary. We were given a gift. But I will tell you that it is a gift we asked for many times.

I was so nervous before Ellie was born because I believed that without 8 hours of sleep I am a waste; that everything will fall apart in my world. And with 2 kids, I didn't know what was going to happen. But, or maybe because of this, a month before Ellie was born, I surrendered my control of sleep to God. I said my sleep was his and I trusted him to sustain me. The thing is, I never imagined that he would sustain me with actual sleep! Ellie was going 6 hour stretches before she was a week old and has never looked back. We are not doing anything; we can't take any credit. This is all an amazing gift.

Psalm 116:1-2 says "I love the LORD, for he heard my voice; he heard my cry for mercy. Because he turned his ear to me, I will call on him as long as I live." Right on. I mean seriously.

Everything else has been going very well too. Kate LOVES Ellie. She is incredible with her. Of course with so much activity lately she's had her share of meltdowns, but what can we expect. I've had a few myself ;) But she is so in love with her little sis. What fun it will be too watch in the upcoming years.

A few more pics below over the past 6 weeks...more to come!

Elizabeth Grace Little - The Story of her Birth

This will be the highlights because I need to go to sleep, but I can't believe how good this is! Things are going so well I can't believe it. This whole thing has been amazing - gentle and serene just as God promised. I feel incredible. Ellie is doing great. Kate is doing great. Brett and I are a great team. So, so good. Let me run down how the story of Ellie's birth:

Monday at my doctor's appointment, Dr. Allen said we would have a "discussion about induction." When we got there, the discussion went like this, "Show up at the hospital tomorrow at 7:30am." Good talk, doc. It was exactly what I wanted though, because I had told Alli that day that I didn't want to have to make a decision about induction, and I didn't have to - he's the expert, we trust him, and he decided. He said we were playing with fire at 40 1/2 weeks so she needed to come now. Great, sold.

Brett and I were all packed up and ready to go. It was nice to get to be so prepared. My parents came in town that night, and the next morning Kate was so excited to see them. Brett's parents came down that afternoon, so Kate was all set for an awesome day.

The labor basically went exactly as Dr. Allen said it would. They gave me pitocin at 9am. I got an epidural at 12:30pm - he said I could have it "whenever my little heart desired", and with contractions every 2 mins, that felt like the right time. Funny side note - we were watching movies, "The Proposal" and then "Alice in Wonderland", and it was during Lewis Carroll's story with Tim Burton's interpretation that I felt the need for drugs...go figure :) They broke my water at 1pm, and then we had a little bit of unwanted excitement. The cord was around Ellie's neck and when my water broke, she slid down and her heart rate got really low for about 12 minutes. Stressful, but they got it back up again and took me off the pitocin to get her back up to normal. I felt good the whole time, although the nurses said with a younger doctor it would have been c-section, which was the same thing that happened with Kate. Luckily Dr. Allen is patient. I was a little bummed at this point thinking the labor would now last a long time, but at 3pm I was ready to go. They said, "Don't laugh until the Dr. gets here or the baby will come out." Uhhh, okay. I didn't believe it, but 4 mins after Dr. Allen got there, Ellie was born.

This time, I watched the birth, and it absolutely floored me. I think part of me still wasn't convinced there was actually a baby inside me. And then when Dr. Allen handed (well sort of threw her) to me, I was absolutely overwhelmed. In that instant, I was overcome by how much I loved her. I had just met her, and I loved her as much as I love Kate and Brett. I guess in advance I thought somehow I'd have to share the love I already have with her, not that it would be an all new capacity and amount. Love works in different currency. I can't get enough of her.

It is incredible how good I feel. I feel like I had a great experience with Kate, and with Ellie it's 10X easier. I guess pushing for 4 mins versus 2 hours helps a bunch. Being scheduled made us so much more well rested, so that is great. I was worried I wouldn't remember anything about having a newborn, but it's coming back to us really well. Overall, just so, so good.

Kate couldn't be more excited. She came into the delivery room after Ellie was born and was so sweet. She ran in, wanted to hold her and give her hugs, she had bought her a little Grover present. She is such an amazing big sister, it makes me cry.

Our parents were such a wonderful help. It means so much to have that kind of support and love from them. THANK YOU GUYS! We also have such wonderful friends who've been visiting and calling. The whole thing feels easier with that circle of support.

I have to admit I'm still just a bit nervous about having enough energy to do it. I'm trying to surrender my control and nervousness about sleep and trust that God will carry me and sustain me. In the hospital my daily Bible verse on my blackberry was Isaiah 46, and vs. 3-4 says "Listen...you whom I have upheld since you were conceived, and have carried since your birth. Even to your old age and gray hairs
I am he, I am he who will sustain you.
I have made you and I will carry you;
I will sustain you and I will rescue you."
I trust that and I'm trying to remember it so I don't get scared.

Ellie is a wonderful baby. Things I already know about her - she is gentle, peaceful, feminine, delicate, loving, joyful, kind, and patient. She's eating really well and sleeping well too. She's been amazingly alert right from the start - looking at us with these big, dark & deep blue eyes. She smiled last night while she was sleeping and it was so beautiful. She's a real treasure.

So overall, the best experience we could have envisioned and hoped for. Welcome to the world Elizabeth Grace Little! We love you soooooooo!!!!

A feat of bravery!

I'm so proud of Kate! Today at Coney she went down this big slide! Brett took her to the top and she definitely had a moment of hesitation, but then brave Kate went shooting down the slide. I was at the bottom to catch her, but she had to shoot under water for a few seconds. And the best part was, she loved it! She wanted to do it again. It was great. By nature, Kate definitely likes to think things through and understand how they'll go before she jumps right in, so this was a big deal for her.

She was a champ today at the pool - she also did a great job floating, both with and without us. With her little arm floats on, she'll go out by herself and sing her little song she learned in swimming lessons, "I'm a little pancake on my back, I'm a little pancake nice and flat." (to the tune of I'm a little teapot.) She HATED floating before the lessons, so just that alone was probably worth the $100.

Maybe her biggest accomplishment of all was an amazing display of patience - definitely not a strong suit for Kate. She was dying to get in the water but Brett and I were still getting ready to go in, so she asked if she could sit on the ramp and wait for us. It was a great test, and she sat there patiently for one, maybe even two minutes. That's HUGE for her! All in all, such a big day. So sad to think that all winter long she'll forget most of this!

What Kate's talking about these days

Kate is so much fun these days. I love being with her. Here are a few snip-its of the kinds of things we talk about during the day:


Kate - "I was in Mommy's belly when I was an itty bitty. Then God told me it was time for me to come out."


Kate - "Can I play with this?"
Me - "Daddy said you're not allowed to play with it."
Kate - "But Daddy's not here."
Me - "Wow...you still have to listen even though he's not here."


Me - "You have an umbrella just like this one in this book."
Kate - "Well, it's similar Mommy, but mine has more colors."
Me - "Uhh, you're right. I stand corrected."


Me - "Do you want a glass of water?"
Kate - "Yes. Can I please have a pink cup to match my pink shirt?"


Kate - "When Ellie gets here I'm going to huggle her, huggle her, huggle her!"


Kate - "Daddy, is that your cup on my furniture?"
Brett - "Yes, Kate, that's mine."
Kate (laughing) - "Silly, Daddy, that's not where we put cups!"
(Note to readers - I swear we're not trying to raise a neat freak. We don't talk about it, but actions speak loudly apparently.)


Kate - "Can I please get Ellie out of your belly?"
Me - "God says when it's time for her to come out."
Kate - "I'll just get her out for a little bit. Then we can put her back. I want to hug her!"


Kate (singing to my belly) - "I'm your big sister and I love you! I love you! I love you!"

Another shot of summer fun - Luke and Kate chillin in the pool

Quack Quack

Another day of fun while waiting for Ellie :) Today we went on the Cincinnati Duck Tour with the Russells - Kelly, Mac, Bode & Chaney. We loved it. It's a boat and a bus that looks like a duck. I learned some good new facts about Cincinnati, like the original state of the Ohio River is 20ft X 5ft (which was how it was during the Civil War when it served as the Mason-Dixon line) and that P&G started making soap because there was so much lard left over from the pigs being slaughtered here in "Pork-opolis." I always love being on the water, although today at 100 degrees it felt HOT.

Although there are still a few hours left in the day, it's looking promising that Ellie will not be born on Friday the 13th, which I'm very happy about. Not that I believe in all that junk, but who wants to have their birthday on a day given over to the occult. Any other day from now forward feels good. I'm starting to think we're going to have to go in and get her. She seems a little too comfortable in there. I'm still fine, but looking in the mirror I can definitely tell she's getting big. If it's not before then, I have an appointment on Monday with my doctor to discuss induction, which I am very fine with. So, we shall see!!!

Let's get this straight -

Boy is this a good one... Today Kate and I went to the Museum Center with Tara, Hyland and Lydia. We had an awesome time. Kate LOVES being with the girls. Very fun. Anyways, Kate and I were walking out to the car, just the two of us, and here was our conversation:

Kate - "I'm going to get in my car seat by myself."

Me - "Because it's so hot, I'm going to put you in your seat so you don't get burned."

Kate (repeating herself, but this time with a kick) - "I'm going to get in my car seat by myself because I'M IN CHARGE."

FULL STOP ON THE SIDEWALK.

Me (calmly but clearly) - "No Kate, that's absolutely incorrect. You are not in charge. Mommy and Daddy are in charge."

Kate - "But I want to be in charge."

Me - "I totally understand that, but it doesn't work that way. God put Mommy and Daddy in charge of you. You don't get to be in charge."

At this, she starts sobbing. I took that as a positive sign, like she got what I was saying, but of course was not happy with it. I'm a betting woman, and I'd put down cash that this is an issue we'll come back to...learning to submit to authority is not easy, Kate, you are correct.

Cute girls at the museum :)